I Need a Drink: How My Dog Ruined a Good News Day

In my last post, I told you about how Chuck forced himself out of a second story window for who-knows-what reason. In this post, I'm going to tell you about how he did it again just a few days later. Meaning, today.

I came home from my HSG today after having picked up lunch and an iced latte. I wasn't really worried when I came in the front door and Chuck wasn't there to greet me; if I come home at a not-so-usual time, he won't always make a big deal about my arrival. I set down the mail and took my lunch upstairs. I peeked into the guest room, expecting to find him on the bed in his goofy cone. He wasn't there. What was there was the screen, all torn up and laying on the bed with the window wide open.

This [expletive deleted] dog did it again! Except this time, he pulled the screen into the room, and somehow squeezed through the bed posts while wearing his cone. I walked outside and saw our friend and neighbor Tim walking his li'l guy Seamus.

Chuck [expletive deleted] did it again! He jumped out of the window and he's gone!

"Uh... what? Oh man." (Sorry for coming at you with that like a freight train, Tim.)

Tim walked the near by parks with Seamy while I called Jamie and went in the opposite direction. Jamie called Animal Control, put a Lost Dog post on our community's lost and found message board and headed home from work while I walked down the trail that Jamie often walks Chuck on. I circled both schools nearby (since Chuck would not hesitate to go play with all the kids at recess) then headed back toward home through some neighborhoods.

Jamie found me in one neighborhood and picked me up. We headed around the park and the middle school and up through our old neighborhood, and then stopped at the elementary school by our house to see if Chuck had shown up there. (He hadn't.)

While we were there, our friend Jarrod called me and asked how I was doing, if we found the dog, and suggested I call the local Humane Society to give them a heads up in case someone turns him in there. He hopped in the car with his buddy and drove around to help us look for Chuck. (I owe him a thousand beers and thank yous for being calm and clear-headed when Jamie and I were stressing out and also for the hug and getting me away from my bitch of a neighbor who was talking to me like I was an idiot.)

Jamie dropped me off at home so I could eat some of my lunch. I hadn't eaten all day so that and all of the walking and stressing and crying made me feel ready to collapse or barf. (I did neither.) I ate a few bites, made a couple calls then headed out to walk the neighborhood and check the bushes in the case that Chuck had been injured and was hiding in a bush or something. That was when I met up with Jarrod and the bitchy neighbor, then Jamie pulled up. We chatted then split up again.

I walked to the nearby park where Jamie met up with me. We were going to walk the neighborhoods, but decided to walk back to the car and drive some more when I got a phone call. It was a neighbor down the street. She had Chuck!

She found Chuck in a bush all caught up in his bandana and the piece of fabric that tied his cone on, so she helped him get those off and put him in her garage and gave him water. She luckily thought to check the message boards, which is where she found my number. Of course, I pick him up and he's like "Oh, hey Mom!" like no big deal.

I gave him a pat down and he wasn't sensitive anywhere, and the cut on his knee hadn't reopened, so I'm going to just keep an eye out for the things that the vet told me to watch the last time he went out the window instead of going back for more x-rays right away.

Right now, I really just want to either have a drink or take a nap. Maybe both.

Oh, and hey, my HSG was all good. These tubes are clear! I might elaborate on that in another post. Maybe.

When Dogs (Try to) Fly

Yesterday, around 3:30pm, I get a call from a number I don't recognize. I let it go to voicemail. Half a minute later, I listen to the message.

Hi Sam, this is Jennifer Lastname-- actually, you don't know me. I'm your neighbor. Your dog-- your black dog fell out of the window. He seems okay, we're just hanging out in my garage.

The rest was just details as to which condo she was in. Anyway, I'm flipping out on the inside because I deduced that he had fallen from the second story window. I called her back, her tone was that there was nothing major wrong with him so I was a little more at ease.

The window from which Chuck jumped. Jamie was quick to fix the screen. He's a self-proclaimed screening pro, now.

I left work and headed home, grabbed his leash, then walked out through the garage to head to pick him up. (Her garage is opposite mine and one-over.) When she answers, I see Chuck gently pushing the door to her garage open to come see me. He runs out to me and is all "Hey, what's up Mom!". Seriously, dog? She showed me that the only thing she found on him was a cut on his knee.

She explained to me that she was out back talking to another neighbor when they heard him fall. She didn't specify, but because I know him, I assume that Chuck just got up and ran straight to them to find out if they saw that cool stunt he just did.

Chuck loves looking out windows, especially when they're open and he can smell everything. The downstairs windows we always make sure to keep closed when we're not around because we wouldn't put it past him to bust through the screen to run after a bunny. Chuck loves hanging out on the bed in the guest room because we leave those windows open when it's nice. The headboard of the guest bed is pushed up to those two windows up there. It's the metal kind with bars, so we always assumed it was safe to leave the windows open. (We also assumed our dog was smart enough to NOT jump out of a second story window.)

It had to have been a stunt. See, the bars on the guest bed are fairly narrow. He would have had to really work to squeeze through them. Also, the screen was completely busted through, not just pushed out of the window as a whole. He had to have been working on that screen as well. I just don't get it.

Coned and back behind bars. (The garage in the background is where he hung out til I picked him up.)

When I got Chuck home, I called the vet.

So, funny story: my dog just jumped out of a second-story window. Can I bring him in to get checked out?

"OH MY GOD, is he okay!?"

The vet gave him a manual body check and assessed the gash on his knee. He said everything seemed fine, but it'd be best to take some x-rays just to confirm and also to make sure he didn't have any internal damage. I agreed to the x-rays and the staple for his cut. Afterward, the vet showed me the x-rays.

"He must be made of steel." he said. 

He had absolutely no broken bones and no sign of organ damage. (We did, however, find out that he has arthritis in his knee.)

Apparently, he was a champ about getting his staples.

$342 later, we still have our crazy dog, which is nothing when I consider that we could have been spending thousands on surgeries, or even worse, he could have died. Thank you, Chuck, for being so resilient, but can you maybe, I don't know, NOT jump out of windows?

 

 

Out of the Window and Off His Rocker

I gave Chuck a big hug before I left for work yesterday. He really had upset me with his recent antics; I was almost certain he was either lost forever or going to end up dead when he made that jump again on Monday. I'm still having a hard time shaking that he could have been out of my life for good.

I noticed that when I hugged him, he didn't react in his normal way. His usual self would give a quiet grumble or just run off to his bed. He's not a hugger. He likes his space. But yesterday, he didn't grumble or try to get away. He settled in and let me hold him.

He wasn't himself, so I ran back up to the kitchen (on the second level) and eyeballed the windows over the sink.

I should close those. Would he? Nah. Maybe?

I assessed the counter and decided that he could definitely get up there if he really wanted to, so I closed the windows and ran off to work.

Half-way through my day I felt my gut sink. I had this terrible feeling that he was gone again. I talked myself out of it.

None of the windows are open. He'd have had to have grown thumbs and gained dexterity in just three hours to have gotten out. Get back to work.

I came home from work around 3:45 and heard Chuck hit the window with his nose, so before unlocking the door, I glanced over. My eyes widened and my chest slowly filled with air as I walked closer to the window.

Oh. MY. GOD.

I unlocked the door and walked inside the house like a robot and turned toward the living room. Chuck is prancing around my legs, ears back, his body curling to the left and to the right as he wagged his tail and licked the air.

"nnNNNO!" I yelled as I pointed toward his bed. 

Chuck immediately ran into his bed as I stood there, staring in disbelief.

The only time Chuck has been destructive was the first year we had him. He was around a year old when we adopted him, and was still into chewing things. Even then, that was it. He gnawed on my high heels, the corners of the coffee table and, well, that's pretty much it. The only things he had ever destroyed were the toys we gave him that he was allowed to destroy.

I walked upstairs to the kitchen. My heart pounded as I saw stuff from the counter on the floor and dog hair and dirty paw prints on the counter.

That [expletive deleted] actually did it! 

There was wet nose and slobber marks all over the windows and he had managed to pull little pieces of foam out of the window edges.

I called Jamie and then I cried.

Google told me that dogs usually develop separation anxiety after a major change like a move or an addition or subtraction of people in the household. We have had no major changes and I cannot figure out what has made him like this.

Since he broke the zipper on his pop-up crate (and even if he hadn't, we know that wouldn't keep him contained), we decided to buy him a steel crate. I ran to PetCo while Jamie cleaned up the living room. $135 later, we're going to try this calming aid as well as put Chuck in his crate when we're gone. He's already a fan of his crate. We call it his bed and he spends a lot of time in there with the door open; it's like his own room. He will almost always go directly there when we say "Go to bed."

We crate trained him when we adopted him, but it wasn't difficult. You'd think a rescue dog would come with anxieties and house-breaking issues, but Chuck had none. While we did have to use the treat in the back of the crate trick to get him to voluntarily go in, it didn't take much effort or time before he went in there on his own, just to chill out. Since he had been chewing, we put him in there during the night and when we were gone. I worked at home at the time, so it was mostly just during the night.

This time, however, he's fine at night so he'll only be crated for the 5 or 6 hours that I'm at work. I'm hoping this structure helps and he can get back to normal and I can stop being so stressed, exhausted and mentally spent.

And I thought this guy was the crazy one.

No Big News

I have no big news to report, which is good, I guess.

No big news means Chuck has gone 6 days without the crazies coming out. I think he just needed new glasses.

Just kidding, obviously, but my new glasses totally look better on him.

We've stuck with crating Chuck while we're gone and so far it's gone really well. He seems comfortable and while he expresses that he's eager to get out when we walk over to un-latch the door, he's not clawing and being impatient. In most cases, he says hi then ends up deciding to go back in his bed if we're not doing anything particularly interesting to him. So hooray! Things are good with Chuck. (He goes tomorrow to get the sutures taken out of his knee.)

(P.S. Click here to see the best collection of Instagram images ever.)

More no big news is that we have nothing medical planned on the fertility front. Since Jamie's tests were good and my HSG proved all clear, we're just going to take some time to Baby Dance and see how that works out for us now. The HSG can clear up any minor blockages and can also leave those tubes a li'l more open for the first few months after the test, so I think we're just going to try our best to take advantage of that.

The problem with knowing that my chances of getting pregnant are higher, even just ever so slightly, is that my hopes are UP. My brain is saying Come on, after how many months of disappointment, why should that change now? Be real and don't expect much But my uterus is telling me This is our month, man! Then my brain is like Dude, you're going to cry when you start bleeding from your uterus. Your uterus is an asshole. In the figurative sense. In the literal sense, we'd be referring to your cloaca. You don't have a cloaca.


So it's getting tricky again. I'm feeling the excitement I had back when we first started trying, but I'm not going to go back to charting. Keeping track of my body temperature, peeing on ovulation predictors and saying "We have to do it now!" became really stressful and not fun. I think I've spent enough time paying attention to my body to understand the general time frame that ovulation takes place and just keep working that angle. I just don't want to let myself get too hopeful, yet I can't let myself get too cynical either.

I find myself stomping up the stairs, with crossed arms yelling "It's not FAIR!" before slamming the door. Well, mentally, that is. I know that some ladies reading this can relate to feeling really sad when someone's all "Oops! We're having a baby!" If you're an Oops We're Having a Baby, I don't hate you. I don't wish ill will upon you. I'm just so envious, no- I'll admit it, jealous of your ability to get pregnant without trying when we've been trying for so long to no avail. It's like I'm the starving kid in Africa your mom told you about to get you to finish your dinner, except that I'm not in Africa. I'm sitting at your dinner table, watching you eat, wondering Why can't I have that, too?


So, we'll keep trying. Starting this blog has helped me feel better about continuing on with our mission and I believe that comes from the support I've had from those who read it and I am so grateful for the response I've had to it. I am really looking forward to the day that I can share Big News instead of No Big News.

So What!

So what!

if I take a crap ton of pictures of Chase and Chuck. 5 and 6 years later, they're still too cute.

So what!

if I bought this steam basket 5 years ago and used it for the first time the other day.

So what!

if I sometimes sit in the sink to put my makeup on. I'm a grownup and grownups get to do things like that.

So what!

if Chuck refuses to snuggle with us. We can always count on Ruxin for a snuggle fix.

So what!

if tomorrow's going to be another junk post full of old pictures of me that have been posted on the internet. Quantity over quality, right? Oh, wait...

Chuck's Photoshoot

I knew the day before Thanksgiving that I wanted to take my camera to dinner, but I also knew that I didn't really want to deal with the constant adjusting to try and expose decent shots in low light. This led me to dig out my external flash that I bought last year. I played around with it a lot when I first got it, but I never really took it anywhere with me to use in real situations. I hadn't been able to really feel comfortable with it and so it went by the wayside for a while.

Until last Wednesday, when I decided I wanted to finally use it for realsies. So I dug it out, dusted it off, and ran downstairs to bother the dog. He pretty much hates when I come at him with the camera, and this day was no different, but I sat in the doorway of the guest room while Chuck paced around wondering why I wouldn't let him out or play with him.

These shots were taken at the foot of the bed with natural light coming in from the windows at the head of the bed, leaving it pretty shadowy at the foot of the bed. It was the perfect spot to see if I could get my flash to fill in where the shadows were heavy. These photos are my result with only a little little fill light added in Lightroom where his face was still a little dark (aside from the obvious post processing), which is always a challenge while photographing my mostly black dog.

In the end, I'm really happy with these and it feels really good to be playing with my camera again. I need to make a point of it more often. 

Fitness Friday

Zzzzz...

That about sums up how I feel about this week, though I'm sure you could have figured that out on your own if you had noticed since I kinda left the blog hanging after Monday's super emo post.

Last Friday was a good day, motivationally. (I don't think "motivationally" is a word.) It was my off day at the Pilates studio. Monetarily, I max out at 4 days per week instead of the 5 or 6 days that I am used to and on Friday I was feeling motivated to get some activity in, so I leashed up the dog and went for a walk.

It was one of those random summer teaser days; it was 80 degrees and just plain gorgeous outside. Chuck and I hit the trail that bisects our community. It's very hilly and great for exercise. It was also a great test to see how far I've come, physically. Before I worked out, I dreaded these hills. Jamie always wanted to go hike the trail and I hated it because he'd just crank his way to the top and wait for me to drag my ass up each hill. I felt awful physically and mentally during those walks. This time, however, I never lost steam and that felt great.

Chuck made it about 3 miles before he finally stopped pulling. (He's pretty terrible on the leash; he just wants to GO.) It used to be that at about 3 miles, or sooner, I'd be done. I'd be ready to BE home, not head back. I'd be exhausted and my low back would be so, so angry at me. This time, however, I had a choice. I could take the direct route back home or walk up the looooong hill then zig zag through neighborhoods, up and down more hills to get home. I chose the latter!

This time, my back didn't start bothering me until around 4 miles, which was good because I was close to home. My total walk was 4.14 miles and I wasn't completely dead when I walked in the door. I felt so good and motivated that I wanted to take this walk on every off day during the week.

So my next off day was Monday and... I didn't do it. Then my next off day was yesterday and... I didn't do it. I'm pretty disappointed in myself. I could have made the time, I just didn't, and it has affected my DietBet results this week. While I was ahead of schedule on the weight loss, it's crept back up. I blame water weight. (sure.) Fortunately, I'm still right on schedule, so I still feel safe. I'm not behind, so as long as I can keep up with my eating habits and slip in some more cardio, I should probably be good.

Speaking of eating well?

Jamie grilled up some Cornell Chicken last weekend and when I say "some" I mean "a lot", so we had a bunch of leftovers. When Jamie decided he was tired of having it for lunch, I made a soup with it. Cornell Chicken, if you don't know, is marinaded in eggs, oil and vinegar and some seasonings. The vinegar gives it a really amazing flavor, which lent itself nicely to the soup. Along with that, the smokiness from the grill stuck around and tasted fantastic in the soup. My soup (how many times can I say soup? Soup.) had onions, carrots, celery, kale, and a blend of quinoa and brown rice and it turned out really great. It's probably pretty fatty due to the chicken being skin-on with a lot of dark meat, but the veggies and grains are definitely beneficial so... so there.

Soup.

Dear Husband: Why you need me to have an iPad

1. We'll finally have an extra charger in the living room again. 
2. You won't have to hear me complain about how long it takes the netbook to do pretty much anything. (Seriously, that hipster of a mini-lappy likes to pretend it's 1997 and still on dial-up connection.)
3. I won't have to steal your real lappy out of that sweet leather briefcase you have. (This means you can still use it when I want to spend all Sunday on Pinterest!)
4. Remember that Pocket PC you used to have? It'd be just like that, except way more cool. Your finger is the Stylus! (Though it'd require a much larger pocket.)
5. Our baby will be a genius with all those learnin' apps that probably exist?
6. Chuck could really benefit from this some how, too, I'm sure. (Chuck's the dog, for those unknowing.)

Okay, so these aren't very good reasons and we don't really need an iPad. The advertisements do a really great job at making me want one. Retina display, you say? Cool. Oh look, they're creating impressionistic art! I can do that too! (Probably not.) I (we) can play Angry Birds on a large enough screen that I (we) don't have to either a.) scroll back and forth and guess where to aim or b.) zoom out so that the birds are tinier than the period at the end of this sentence. (First world problems.)

Alright, fine. I fully admit that we don't need an iPad and have managed to survive without one. But wouldn't it just be cool, or something? While sure, it'd be a great addition to the household, I want you to know how much I appreciate, and am grateful for, everything you've provided for us over the years. I love you!

</mushy stuff>

Another Cat Post

Because The Paper Mama is hosting a pet photo contest and I want to enter it, man!

I had a difficult time choosing which photo to enter, and of which animal. I have this great photo of Chuck wearing my glasses, but I didn't want to enter an Instagram photo. So I dug around flickr and facebook and finally decided on this photo of Chase.

Way back when my camera was still new and exciting, I took a lot of pictures of the cat. The dog got his fair share, but he's not as tolerant as Chase, so the cat was my main subject. For example, if Chuck is being super cute and still, as soon as I grab my phone, he jumps and runs. What the crap, dog? So, the cat it is.

On this particular day, I was instigating yawns during Chase's sleepy afternoon. I managed to get him to yawn three or four times and got this hilarious shot from one of them. I just love it.

Okay, the end.

Good bye.

Adios.

Ping Pong in a Winter Wonderland

Well, hello there, fellas. I haven't been around much the past couple of weeks due to a hectic schedule of having to do just about everything but blog. It's okay, I'm back now and I'm really excited to share with you guys the photos from our Ping Pong in a Winter Wonderland party!

I don't really know how I got this idea, but I'm glad it came to me because it turned out perfectly. I started planning it probably 5 weeks ago, and quickly began picking up things here and there to decorate with. In the end, I managed to make my garage into a fairly impressive makeshift wonderland of silver sparkles and white snow.

I spent most of Friday decorating and only managed to get half of it finished. Saturday was spent first cleaning the house, then finishing the garage decor, then finally making some grub for our guests. Well, I made a couple small things, but Jamie brined and baked a turkey. Let me tell you, the turkey was probably the best party food idea ever. He cut it up and one of our friends brought over rolls and cheese to make turkey sandwiches.

Jamie also cut up some kielbasa we had in the freezer and made a barbecue sauce for them to live in until they were eaten, which also was delicious. We offered our usual pepperoni dip, which I've been making for probably ten years now. I double the recipe and it's almost always scraped clean. I think my food favorite of the night, though, was this bloomin' onion pullapart bread that I found on Pinterest.

I should have made two!

Most of the food was completely wiped by the end of the night with only a bit of turkey for Jamie and I to have leftover sandwiches yesterday, so I think the food was a success. Now on to the decor! I was so excited when I finally finished the garage that I instantly put it up on Instagram.

@jamiedana

The party wasn't officially an ugly sweater party, but I tacked "ugly holiday apparel strongly encouraged" onto the end of the invites and ended up very pleased and entertained with the turnout.

Ella is Jewish so she threw in a light up menorah necklace. I bought her the sippy cup since it was the first night of Hanukkah and all. Chris had pieces of leafy garland stuck onto his sweatshirt. It happened to also be the same garland that I have on my rails in my house.

Jeff's sweater house had real Christmas lights on it! I was also very happy with Alexis' tie and their matching hats.

I found this sweatshirt online (Skip n Whistle) for Jamie. When you see it...

I wish Clare had held her red, Christmas tree purse that she had brought! It really completed her outfit. Tim went for a very classy ugly sweater look. Some thought it was kind of like something a Christmas Leprechaun would wear. Whatever it was, it was fantastic.

Chuck's had this sweater in his closet for 4 or 5 years now and just had to wear it on this occasion.

Misty had the Ping Pong Elf look down perfectly.

Mark's shirt says "My grandkids and I were made for each other!"

Renata beat Jamie in ping pong while wearing an obscured by her hair snowman shirt and Mike was impressed in his ugly Christmas graphic tee.

Chuck was so stoked about all the ping pong!

Sometime before Jamie lost at ping pong.

The final match was Wesley against our reigning champ from Cosmic Ping Pong, Jeff.

Jeff won.

And all the balloons and snow made their way inside the house.

And so the party was a success with just over 30 people showing up! And even though we tracked all of the fake snow from the garage all through the house, the mess really wasn't too bad. Though that probably had to do with Jamie's late-night alcohol-fueled after-party cleaning habit. (Thanks, Husband!)

Thanks to everyone who came!

Oh, and I was there, too. "Come at me, bro!"

New Here?

If you found your way to my blog via Pink On The Cheek, this post's for you! If you haven't read my About page, this post is also for you! In any case, if you're new here, welcome! I'm glad you're here and I hope you stay a while.

I'm Sam. This is me:

Except that I just chopped off all of my hair, so this is me now:

And this is my handsome husb, Jamie:

We have a dog, Chuck:

Click here, here then here if you want to read about how my dog went temporarily insane.

And a cat, Chase:

He doesn't like the dog.

We don't have any kids, but that's what we're working on. I started this blog as a way to keep my family updated on our fertility treatments, but it's turned into much more than that. These days, I write about my fitness/weight loss journey, I link up with Life After I Dew for So What Wednesday ('cept I use pictures!), and whatever else I decide the world needs to know about my life.

I write a lot about my dad, who passed in March of 2011. I started a new weekly series called Dad's Letters where I share some old letters that he had written while in the Air Force during the 60's, which I think is kind of neat.


And if this link-laden post wasn't enough for you, I'll leave you with a list of some of my most popular posts.

• When Everyone Knows (About how telling the world you're trying to conceive leads to the world knowing your grown-up fun-time schedule.)
• Giving Myself a Shot (A very out of focus video of the first time I had to give myself a shot.)
• How I Cheat Starbucks (Because I don't like paying nearly $5 for a latte.)
• Seven Million (Sperm, that is!)
• A Very Special So What (About finding out my mom has cancer a year and a half after losing my dad to it.)
• It's a Series of Tubes (About the not-so-fun process of getting x-rayed to see if my fallopian tubes were open.)

I'd say that's enough for now! Thanks for stopping by, I hope you'll stay!

Now, if you read through all of this and you're NOT new here, then I'll tell you about how these new people got here. Lauren at Pink On The Cheek is hosting a giveaway to which I contributed. It's for a $100 gift card to ErinCondren.com. If you're not in the loop, Erin Condren sells pretty much anything you could ever think of in regards to organizing and planning just about anything in your life. If you need help in that area, I urge you to check out the giveaway.

Okay, that's it. See ya later.

So What Wednesday

I'm linking up with Shannon from Life After I Dew again for So What Wednesday!


So what!

if I'm bombarding Instagram with fitness posts. I feel good about my progress! And maaaaybe it will inspire someone else to work hard.

So what!

if that was kind of a lie. I like posting my fitness stuff, but I felt like it could really annoy people. So today, after seeing that my sister in law, Sara, started a separate, fitness-related IG account, I followed suit. If you want to keep up with more than my weekly fitness posts here, follow my fitness account: @fitgosam!

So what!

if I took a picture of myself drinking Starbucks in the bathroom after getting a haircut. I wasn't pooping or anything. 

So what!

if I made Jamie pose like I was taking a picture of him so I could document this evidence of time travel. This man is clearly from the 90's.

So what!

if this photo is irrelevant to this post. Look how cute Chuck is!

SO WHAT.